Full Moon in Sagittarius, 18th June, 2008

Hi everyone,

The full moon is in Sagittarius and it always comes with a big burst of optimism. Hope that is reaching you where you are!

Calling the circle
As we come to our last full moon of Spring, we call to and honor the spirits of the East, spirits of this season, of new beginnings, new starts. Element of air, first breath, cool dawn. The power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.

We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within us always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.

And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.

Now we summon the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told, where laws are made. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.

And we call to those spirits above us, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children, and to the brightest of moons. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.

And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.

Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome and free to express themselves.

Where is the Moon?
The full moon is in Sagittarius is a powerful and optimistic one and I think this one feels particularly strong for manifesting with the power of our beliefs, hopes and dreams as inspiration. I am always a bit travel-hungry at this particular full moon, and well-timed, as I am leaving New York!

Talking stick
I am on my way to NY (a quick work trip NY-moon lodgers, sorry!) – will be leaving NY the day I post this actually, but I’m getting an early start, because I had such a startling and powerful conversation with Owen this morning I wanted to write about it. I am going to NY on my own, something that is easier on one level, but really not on another. Gary and Owen are a big part of me and I feel their loss really deeply when we are not all together. Plus I genuinely don’t like leaving Owen behind nor the idea that something unthinkable could happen that would leave him without me. It was this thought that had plagued me this week until speaking to Gary about it, who reminded me that anything can happen anywhere/anytime and that I just need to have faith that there is a path that we are all on and whatever happens, that is the right path. Whether I like the sound of some of those possible paths or not.
These feelings of fear of the unthinkable were shared by Owen too, as it turns out, who for the first time really asked me what would happen if, in his words, “I fell out of the plane”. After making light of it a bit and reinforcing the unlikelihood of that happening, I explained that his dad would continue to take care of him, and that I would forever be his guardian angel, always watching over him and caring for him – and that I’d never really leave him. (All of this with a big smile and without tears, which was difficult.) He thought about that for a while and then said, “Ok – but I think you should wear a parachute just in case.” It was so touching, but what really got me about it (apart from the fact that I wouldn’t have a parachute in actuality) was that I have no parachute in any respect when it comes to my love for him. I am continually feeling thrust from the plane; hurtling toward the earth to crack open my heart again, which somehow only reveals more love. How could anyone ever be prepared for parenthood with its thousands of deaths and an equal number of glorious re-births?

It is also father’s day, and having not had a father of my own for 17 years now (which I can’t believe, actually), I think of Gary and what a fantastic, inspired, patient and loving father he is to Owen. Those of you who know us well understand even more clearly the miracle of that for us. He is the best parent for Owen that I can imagine. We met 14 years ago this week, actually, which seem impossible but it is true and he is truly the love of my life.

I am heading off to NY knowing that this is the life that I have waiting for me when I return. And I just love it. I love my family, I love my work, I love my home, I love the earth around me. I think it is important to remember that, going into NY, with all its energy and intensity because this is the life that I authentically want to be living. Parachute or no.

And so, at this full moon, I want to remember to fight my fear of losing it all and all that it creates. And make the choices that I need to make in order to continue to create and nurture this family of mine. I will update this part as I leave NY – but I know it will be with joy to be heading home to the happiest home I can imagine.

Meditation
Imagine yourself lying beneath an ancient oak tree, on a cool but perfectly comfortable spring evening. As you look up, you can see the light of the full moon reaching between the branches, shining down until it is touching you, reaching right into your heart. With each breath, the moonlight feels as though it is reaching through you, deep into the earth, then upward into the sky again. As it moves through you and into the earth, you feel it spiraling deep below you, into something of a staircase. You stand up, and begin to wind your way down the staircase of moonlight, beginning on the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then spiraling around to the twelfth and the eleventh, then around to the tenth, then spiraling down and around and inward to the ninth, then the eighth, and around and inward to the seventh, then the sixth. You pause for a moment on the sixth step, leaving anything behind that you don’t choose to take along with you. Then continuing to spiral down and around to the fifth step, then the fourth, then the third. And around and inward to the second, and then finally the first step. You step off the staircase onto firm ground and head out toward the south.

You step out into a brightly lit meadow in full flower. It is alive and vibrant; teeming with new life, closer now to summer than to spring. It feels empowering to walk through it as though the life force around you is so powerful that it is empowering you too. If you feel depleted in any way, it restores you as you make your way across, bring you back to your strongest self. Your most ideal self. In the distance you see a dwelling, one that is both ancient and familiar and you head in that direction. As you approach, the house itself seems to be alive with energy as you approach the door to the house of your wise woman.

As you are about to knock, the door swings open and your wise woman greets you, giving you a big kiss and hug. Her home feels extremely comfortable today giving you a sense of instant peace. She leads you to the kitchen where she has cooked for you and you speak freely with her about anything that comes to mind, or just listen to what she has to say to you.

When you are ready, she leads you from the kitchen to a hallway with many doors. When you find the door that is right for you, you step through straight into a celebration, and it is for you! Friends, loved ones, guides, your past and future selves have all come together to celebrate with you. It might be to celebrate an event, an accomplishment, a beginning, an end, or maybe they are just there to celebrate you. Each has brought you a gift, and as you open them, they explain what the gift means and why they chose it for you. Your wise woman gives you the last gift and offers one word or phrase for you to carry with you to remember this experience. Once all of the gifts are open you stay to enjoy the celebration for a while longer, and you can ask any questions that you may have of those gathered. Finally, when you are ready to leave, you make your way back to the door with your wise woman, but knowing that you can return to this place at any time.

Your wise woman leads you back to the front of the house. She gives you a big hug goodbye, and while in her embrace, she whispers the same word or phrase to help you remember her gift and all the gifts that you received. When you are ready, you step back out into the vibrant meadow, enjoying and absorbing the powerful life force around you. You follow it back toward the doorway that brought you here, and when you are ready you step through then back onto the staircase.

Stepping back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the third step and the fourth. Then spiraling around to the fifth and the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that moment of infinite perfection. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then lying back down onto the earth where you began, under the beautiful oak. And when you are ready you open your eyes.

Prayers for our circle
I didn’t get any specific calls to prayer so much love to all of you!

Tara