Full Moon in Pisces, 15th, September 2008

Hi everyone,

This is the last full moon before autumn begins; the equinox is only five or so days away. I welcome the autumn arriving, but will miss the summer – more than ever before in my life. Still, autumn is always my favorite season and I’m ready for it!

Calling the circle
We call to and honor the spirits of the East, spirits of new beginnings, new starts. Element of air, first breath, cool dawn. The power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.

We call now to the spirits of our season – soon passing away, spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within us always. We call the spirits of the South, offering our gratitude for their support this season and ask them to join our circle.

And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.

Now we summon the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told, where laws are made. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.

And we call to those spirits above us, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children, and to the brightest of moons. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.

And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.

Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome and free to express themselves.

Where is the Moon?
The full moon is now in Pisces. It is a moon of deep feelings, lots of energy from dreams and powerful intuition as well. It’s also the harvest moon, the one that rises early and hangs low in the sky to give a final burst of extra light. It is a moon that taps into our true feelings and the information that we get from our deepest self. Its energy carries us into the equinox, now only a few days away, where we will usher in the autumn, and balance our energies.

Talking stick
I feel like I’ve had nothing to say for the last few posts and this one I feel like I could go in so many directions I’m not sure which to choose! This is the day before Gary starts school and it ends a long period of deeply intense family and relationship time as he pushes off more into the world. Not that he’s been totally out of the world – his art has kept him very connected to people and he is always involved in various things, but this is a real step into a new direction and one that he’s been deciding on for a long time. Since before we moved here, and most intensely since Owen started school two years ago. So it feels momentous. It is timed, interestingly, with my work turning again toward NY nearly exclusively, which on one level makes me feel a bit nervous and on the other is immensely practical with Gary needing a bit more flexibility now.

And hence, my first dilemma this month. I have figured out a new avenue to pursue for funding for my green project. But – it could take me away a bit more, at least initially. Is this really the right time to go down that road? And, after seven years of Gary taking a back seat career-wise (whatever the reasons), isn’t it maybe time to take a backseat of my own briefly, while he gets it together? I think maybe it is.

And, even more deeply, how will it feel to be alone so much? Because of the way this has worked out, I will probably be fully alone for the first time in just years at least three days a week. Of course there is plenty of work to fill that time. But – maybe there is enough time for me in there too. To write? To think? I’m not sure. I need to think about it.

I was listening to my Agape podcast this week and Reverend Michael told this story about an ant. How this ant was traveling from his ant hill across some grass to a sugar cube in the distance. To the ant, once he had left the hill and could no longer see it, it was in his past. He couldn’t see the sugar cube in his future yet, although he knew it was there – he was just in the present moment of being an ant, getting from one place to the next. But we, observing the ant, could see it all – we could see the big picture of the ant because while his consciousness was not expanded far enough to see his whole existence, ours was bigger than the ant, and we could see it clearly. You can see where this is going. In two ways: first, I feel like the ant. I am at a juncture, like the sixth step that I write about on the staircase, where I can’t see exactly where we’ve been or where we are going. I remember, obviously, and we have goals for the future, but I am in the grass. If I said that it is without some trepidation that I am in this place, I wouldn’t be telling the truth. But secondly, and more importantly, I am still feeling a sense of profound well-being about it all, despite not being able to see because while it is beyond my perception on one level, it is not beyond that perception on another. And I feel I have glimpses of a really dynamic and happy future, for all of us. That the truth of us is much larger than these lives – and every once and a while it feels very, very clear. So despite my little ant’s fears, I am trying to move forward in complete faith that this is precisely where we are meant to be.

I am moved by one more thing at this particular moon. The fact that it is a harvest moon feels so potent to me, as I cook, jar, bottle, freeze, jam, and preserve my way through the pounds and pounds of apples, berries, tomatoes, zucchinis, etc. that are finishing up in my garden right now. It has been amazing, comforting and surprisingly fulfilling to spend so much time gardening this summer, and in fact it has transformed my experience of summer completely. So much of it was spent on the ground, with Owen and Gary, and our friends, just enjoying the earth and all of its harvest. I am so humbled and grateful for it – I will really look forward to spring this year. Although, and I acknowledge this as the season ends, it will be good to have a rest from it too.

So, for this full moon, I will think about myself and what I’d like to do while being loving and patient with the one big and one small man in my life whose needs are much more immediate right now, taking a back seat and being supportive and giving of my time and my love.

Meditation
Imagine yourself lying beneath a big, full willow tree, whose branches reach all the way to ground so that you can lie inside its embrace. It is a warm summer night, and as you look up, you can see the light of the full moon reaching between the branches, shining down until it is touching you, reaching right into your heart. With each breath, the moonlight feels as though it is reaching through you, deep into the earth, then upward into the sky again. As it moves through you and into the earth, you feel it spiraling deep below you, into something of a staircase. You stand up, and begin to wind your way down the staircase of moonlight, beginning on the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then spiraling around to the twelfth and the eleventh, then around to the tenth, then spiraling down and around and inward to the ninth, then the eighth, and around and inward to the seventh, then the sixth. You pause for a moment on the sixth step, leaving anything behind that you don’t choose to take along with you. Then continuing to spiral down and around to the fifth step, then the fourth, then the third. And around and inward to the second, and then finally the first step. You step off the staircase onto firm ground and head out toward the south.

You step out into a forest, green and lush, but with just a hint of autumn in the air. The sun is still high in the sky, but past midday, and the breeze is cool. You walk into the forest, following a clear path heading right into the centre. You notice anything of interest around you, the animals, the trees, the plants. As you near the centre, you come to a stream. You look into the stream, noticing anything of interest there as well – the life within it, your reflection. When you are ready, you cross the stream and walk onto the path on the other side. It brings you to the centre of the forest, and a dwelling there, one that is ancient but always familiar. You have reached the home of your wise woman.

As you are about to knock, the door opens, and she greets you warmly. She brings you into the kitchen, where she is cooking for you, and you talk freely about whatever comes to mind, maybe asking questions, maybe just listening to her thoughts for you. When you are ready, she leads you down a hallway with many doors. You walk to the end of the hallway and when you are ready, you open the door and enter the room. The room is made of earth, with no roof, so that the beautiful full moonlight can shine in. You sit in the centre of the room, basking in the light, when your wise woman brings you an empty bowl. As you hold the bowl, it fills, with all of those things in your life that you have been able to bring into fruition this year. Your wise woman encourages you to pause and allow yourself to feel proud of what you have been able to accomplish. When that is complete, your wise woman takes the bowl once more and when she hands it back to you, it is empty. You place it in front of you, and allow the moonlight to dance on it. The light begins to form images, those things that have not yet come to pass that you would like to manifest quietly through the autumn and winter. You can ask questions, or simply see what comes to you. Your wise woman sits at your side and answers any questions that you might have. Finally, when the images have stopped, your wise woman asks you to reach your hand into the bowl, where there is an object for you to take along with you. You take the object and if you need any further clarification, you ask your wise woman about it. When you have all of the information you need, you rise to leave the room, knowing that you can return here whenever you need to.

She leads you back to the front of the house, back to the path that took you here. She gives you a big hug goodbye, and while in her embrace, she whispers one word or phrase that will help you to remember your intention for this moon, or just something that you need to hear. You thank her and then head back out into the forest, winding your way along the path, back toward the doorway. You cross the stream again, then step back onto the path on the other side. When you reach the doorway, you step back through.

Stepping back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the third step and the fourth. Then spiraling around to the fifth and the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that perfect moment in infinity. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then lying back down onto the earth where you began, under the beautiful willow. And when you are ready you open your eyes.

Prayers for our circle
Special prayers for all of those with new beginnings this autumn – may they bring deep fulfillment!

Much love to all of you,

Tara