Hi everyone,
I am combining the (late!) new moon post and the Imbolc one because they are so close this year. I hope you are feeling empowered by the energy of change and new beginnings!
Calling the circle
As we contemplate Imbolc, we summon the spirits of the East, spirits of Springtime, new beginnings, new starts. Spirits of the returning light that we celebrate tonight. Element of air, first breath, cool dawn. The power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.
We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within is always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.
And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.
Now we call the spirits of the North, spirits of Imbolc. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.
And we call to those spirits above us, the moon in her many faces, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.
And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.
Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome and free to express themselves.
Imbolc thoughts/Talking stick
I have so much going on around me, but am away with work right now (sorry NYers, no time for moon lodge this time, in meetings into the wee hours!) and so can’t write about it. But in the midst of it all I feel very powerful right now – and very grounded. I struggle still to write that; like it is ok to feel it but not say it. So for this moon I intend to embrace and love it and not shy away from the intensity of it.
On Imbolc: when I get home the sheep will have had their lambs and the little plant shoots will be starting to pop up. There is life everywhere. That is in direct contrast to my winter and many of the things that are going on in my family. But it is all a cycle and spring will come. Not here yet, but there is hope.
I will write a much better catch up at the full moon.
Meditation
Imagine yourself lying on the ground beneath a beautiful but leafless old oak tree, in the middle of a field, under a starry, windless sky. The ground feels cold, but all around you are the beginnings of Spring, small plants forming a soft green carpet. As you breathe in and out feel that you are breathing in time with the stars, that you are a part of the setting that surrounds you. Then allow yourself to imagine that you are getting smaller – smaller and smaller until you are so small that you can stand up and walk into the tree that you were lying underneath. Walking into the tree, looking up, note the vast branch system, how tall and high it is, looking down, note the vast root system, reaching down into the earth farther than you can see. Then, notice that one of the roots is larger than the others, and resembles a spiral staircase. Imagine then stepping onto the 13th step, the step of transformation, then spiraling down and around and inward to the 12th step, then down and around to the 11th and the 10th, spiraling down and around and inward to the 9th, then the 8th, then around and inward to the 7th and the 6th step. Then, pausing on the sixth step, note that as you look up you can no longer see the top, and looking down, that you can no longer see the bottom. You are standing in the middle of the spiral, in a moment of infinite perfection. If there is anything that you are carrying that you don’t want to take with you on your journey, you can leave it on this step. Continuing then to the 5th step and the 4th, spiraling around to the 3rd and the 2nd and then finally the 1st step, then stepping into a clearing with four doorways, each pointing in one of the four directions. Imagine yourself walking down the pathway that heads north.
When you step through the doorway you see a pathway lit entirely by candles, heading off into the distance. You follow the candlelit path as it winds through the night. It seems to spiral around, so that even as you are walking farther and farther, somehow you feel as though you are walking inward as well. The candles are reflecting each other’s light, a kaleidoscope of color in the darkness. The path begins to widen, and you realize that you are coming into a ceremonial circle, also lit all the way around with candles. You move into the circle, where you are joined by your friends, guides, and ancestors, and finally, your wise woman enters, carrying a large candle, which she places in the center of the circle, then comes to stand by your side.
For a while you are still, feeling the light fill the night, fill all the dark places in the circle – filling any dark places in you. You become increasingly aware of your breath, and the effect that your breath has on the flames, how it increases the intensity of the light, how it sends the warmth outward. You are aware that everyone in the circle is consciously focusing their breath now, moving the light, the flame as one flame, out into the world. In your mind you are able to direct this light wherever it is needed – to warm any of the cold places. As you do this you are able to imagine Spring, with all of her bounty, and the true abundance of the earth and all of her gifts. Your wise woman leads you to the center then and puts her hands on your belly. She says one word or phrase, offering you a blessing for whatever it might be that you are hoping to give birth to in the Spring. One by one, everyone in the circle comes and places their hands on your belly, offering you a blessing for something that you are manifesting in your life right now. You look down when they have finished, and your whole body is glowing with the light of the flames. You feel the light contained in you, but know that you have the power to direct wherever it is needed as well, that this is what you will take away from the circle.
When you feel that your time in the circle is complete, your wise woman leads you out of the circle and to a beautiful stone table that has appeared, filled with all kinds of food and drink, and those in your circle join you at the table for a beautiful celebration. You can converse freely with them here.
When the meal is finished and it is time to go, you say your goodbyes to your guides, friends, ancestors. Finally, you say goodbye to your wise woman, and head away from the circle, back onto the pathway lit by candles, but now also lit by the light contained within you. The path leads you back to the doorway where you began. You give one last look, then walk through the door.
Stepping back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the third step and the fourth. Then spiraling around to the fifth and the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that perfect moment in infinity. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then back into to the tree. Stepping out of the tree, you find your place beneath it, again enjoying the sweet night air. Then feeling your consciousness return to the space you are in, and, when ready opening your eyes.
Prayers for our circle
Deep prayers for my family: my brothers, my mother, my sister and brother in law, my uncle, my aunt, my cousins. It is a very challenging time on many, many levels. But we have love and each other and hope for the future.
Much love,
Tara
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Inauguration Day, 2009
Inauguration Day, 20th January, 2009
I have never done this, but the phase that is ending feels so long; and the phase beginning feels so critical, it seemed to transcend moons. So, for this very special occasion, I hope you will join me in creating a perfect circle of peace, hope and harmony around the new US president, Barack Obama.
Calling the circle
We summon the spirits of the East, spirits of Springtime, the dawn with all of its promise of new beginnings, new starts. Spirits of balance that we celebrate tonight. Element of air, the power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.
We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within is always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.
And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.
Now we call the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.
And we call to those spirits above us, the moon in her many faces, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.
And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.
Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome and free to express themselves.
Inauguration thoughts/Talking stick
I have been trying to do things today, my normal life things, but am finding it very difficult. I am electric with anticipation for this afternoon, to join with the literally billions of other people who are transfixed by Barack Obama and what he might be able to bring to the world.
Funny enough, for me, this stopped being about race ages ago, although I don’t deny the accomplishment and to see a face standing up there that looks so much more like the faces around the world than any other American president makes me feel a great deal of hope for our future relationships with other countries and cultures. But for me, it is much more than that. It is his ability to see both sides of a coin, the thoughtful way in which he turns over a problem, reaching out to anyone who might have a solution that impresses me so much. He is not dogmatic. He doesn’t swagger. He just seems to think and listen and decide and lead. He is obviously an inspirational speaker too, which doesn’t hurt. But his ability to see past the country’s divisions, so deeply emphasized and exploited over the years, and to almost refuse to acknowledge that those divisions exist is what has been able to bring healing and hope to a very troubled country and clearly what we we desperately needed.
I was dismayed a few weeks back hearing that “liberals” (to use a term you hear kicked around a lot - hard to know what exactly is meant with such a bucket term) were not happy with some of PRESIDENT Obama's cabinet appointments and policy shifts; there was even concern about the choice of minister for the inauguration and for me, that is a total by-product of the political us-against-them hegemony of the modern political era, sewn into us for decades. Just because liberal beliefs are closer to my own does not make that sort of thing any less divisive and destructive. But Barack Obama just keeps looking past it seemingly, preparing to govern all of us, not just the ones that share his views. He keeps listening and refining his views as he goes along, determining the right courses of action based upon where we are, not where we have been. And that is the crux of what I admire so much. I don’t know how I’d be if I were ever called upon to lead in that way, but I like to think I’d be like that.
I know that the expectation heaped upon him is huge, and in our celebrity-obsessed culture it is easy to see why he is a natural celebrity. I would like to think though that if he is effective, if he is able to show us where our common ground is instead of our divisions, if we are in turn able to take that same approach as a society, it is hard to imagine how much good could be achieved. The nice part of that vision is that it takes the responsibility off of this one man and places it back where it also belongs: squarely on our shoulders.
And so, on this inauguration day, I want to surround Barack Obama, his family, his advisers and all of our leaders in the world, with love, with light, with our power. That the wisdom of our collective light can join his and serve as a beacon wherever we are and whatever we do.
Meditation
Imagine yourself lying on the ground beneath a beautiful but leafless old oak tree, in the middle of a field, under a starry, windless sky. The ground feels cold, but all around you are the beginnings of Spring, small plants forming a soft green carpet. As you breathe in and out feel that you are breathing in time with the stars, that you are a part of the setting that surrounds you. Then allow yourself to imagine that you are getting smaller – smaller and smaller until you are so small that you can stand up and walk into the tree that you were lying underneath. Walking into the tree, looking up, note the vast branch system, how tall and high it is, looking down, note the vast root system, reaching down into the earth farther than you can see. Then, notice that one of the roots is larger than the others, and resembles a spiral staircase. Imagine then stepping onto the 13th step, the step of transformation, then spiraling down and around and inward to the 12th step, then down and around to the 11th and the 10th, spiraling down and around and inward to the 9th, then the 8th, then around and inward to the 7th and the 6th step. Then, pausing on the sixth step, note that as you look up you can no longer see the top, and looking down, that you can no longer see the bottom. You are standing in the middle of the spiral, in a moment of infinite perfection. If there is anything that you are carrying that you don’t want to take with you on your journey, you can leave it on this step. Continuing then to the 5th step and the 4th, spiraling around to the 3rd and the 2nd and then finally the 1st step, then stepping into a clearing with four doorways, each pointing in one of the four directions. Imagine yourself walking down the pathway that heads east.
It is dawn, and the sun is just peeking over the horizon – coloring the sky pink and gold. The landscape is gentle and green with the beginnings of new plants; there are early flowers just beginning to poke up over the grass. The pathway that you are walking on is lined with violets, and you make your way along it as it snakes its way upward around a tall hill. You make your way toward the top, feeling the new life teeming all around you in the valley below. When you reach the top, you see that others have gathered already – friends, guides, ancestors, and you join them in the circle. Your wise woman arrives last, stepping into the centre, with Barack Obama.
All is quiet for a while, feeling the powerful silence build until it takes on almost a sound of its own. All the while, the sunlight is increasing, until the circle is completely illumined in a golden dawn’s light. Those in the circle are illuminated, each brightly reflecting love. They have come with a message for Barack Obama, and in turn, each one speaks. When they finish, you are able to speak to them as well, ask questions, or just speak whatever truth is on your mind.
Then, your wise woman calls you into the center of the circle, where she has prepared the ground for seeds. She asks you to plant the seeds for those things that you would like to see growing in your life. Then each person in the circle plants seeds for you as well, which they will nurture and support on your behalf. You return to the circle and join hands with the others until the sun is high in the sky. You feel the hope of spring surrounding everyone and everything on the earth.
When you feel that your time in the circle is complete, your wise woman leads you out of the circle and to a beautiful stone table that has appeared, filled with all kinds of food and drink, and those in your circle join you at the table for a beautiful inaugural celebration. You can converse freely with everyone present.
When the meal is finished and it is time to go, you once again surround Barack Obama, focusing love, light, wisdom and power on him. Finally, you say goodbye to your wise woman, and head away from the circle, back along the path lined with violets. The sun has fully risen now, and the path is more brightly lit than before. When you reach the doorway to the east, you step through back toward the staircase.
Stepping back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the fourth step and the fifth. Then spiraling around to the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that moment of infinite perfection. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then back into to the tree. Stepping out of the tree, you find your place beneath it, again enjoying the sweet night air. Then feeling your consciousness return to the space you are in, and, when ready opening your eyes.
Prayers for our circle
Prayers for our world, for ourselves, for the future – that it be very bright!
Much love,
Tara
I have never done this, but the phase that is ending feels so long; and the phase beginning feels so critical, it seemed to transcend moons. So, for this very special occasion, I hope you will join me in creating a perfect circle of peace, hope and harmony around the new US president, Barack Obama.
Calling the circle
We summon the spirits of the East, spirits of Springtime, the dawn with all of its promise of new beginnings, new starts. Spirits of balance that we celebrate tonight. Element of air, the power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.
We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within is always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.
And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.
Now we call the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.
And we call to those spirits above us, the moon in her many faces, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.
And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.
Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome and free to express themselves.
Inauguration thoughts/Talking stick
I have been trying to do things today, my normal life things, but am finding it very difficult. I am electric with anticipation for this afternoon, to join with the literally billions of other people who are transfixed by Barack Obama and what he might be able to bring to the world.
Funny enough, for me, this stopped being about race ages ago, although I don’t deny the accomplishment and to see a face standing up there that looks so much more like the faces around the world than any other American president makes me feel a great deal of hope for our future relationships with other countries and cultures. But for me, it is much more than that. It is his ability to see both sides of a coin, the thoughtful way in which he turns over a problem, reaching out to anyone who might have a solution that impresses me so much. He is not dogmatic. He doesn’t swagger. He just seems to think and listen and decide and lead. He is obviously an inspirational speaker too, which doesn’t hurt. But his ability to see past the country’s divisions, so deeply emphasized and exploited over the years, and to almost refuse to acknowledge that those divisions exist is what has been able to bring healing and hope to a very troubled country and clearly what we we desperately needed.
I was dismayed a few weeks back hearing that “liberals” (to use a term you hear kicked around a lot - hard to know what exactly is meant with such a bucket term) were not happy with some of PRESIDENT Obama's cabinet appointments and policy shifts; there was even concern about the choice of minister for the inauguration and for me, that is a total by-product of the political us-against-them hegemony of the modern political era, sewn into us for decades. Just because liberal beliefs are closer to my own does not make that sort of thing any less divisive and destructive. But Barack Obama just keeps looking past it seemingly, preparing to govern all of us, not just the ones that share his views. He keeps listening and refining his views as he goes along, determining the right courses of action based upon where we are, not where we have been. And that is the crux of what I admire so much. I don’t know how I’d be if I were ever called upon to lead in that way, but I like to think I’d be like that.
I know that the expectation heaped upon him is huge, and in our celebrity-obsessed culture it is easy to see why he is a natural celebrity. I would like to think though that if he is effective, if he is able to show us where our common ground is instead of our divisions, if we are in turn able to take that same approach as a society, it is hard to imagine how much good could be achieved. The nice part of that vision is that it takes the responsibility off of this one man and places it back where it also belongs: squarely on our shoulders.
And so, on this inauguration day, I want to surround Barack Obama, his family, his advisers and all of our leaders in the world, with love, with light, with our power. That the wisdom of our collective light can join his and serve as a beacon wherever we are and whatever we do.
Meditation
Imagine yourself lying on the ground beneath a beautiful but leafless old oak tree, in the middle of a field, under a starry, windless sky. The ground feels cold, but all around you are the beginnings of Spring, small plants forming a soft green carpet. As you breathe in and out feel that you are breathing in time with the stars, that you are a part of the setting that surrounds you. Then allow yourself to imagine that you are getting smaller – smaller and smaller until you are so small that you can stand up and walk into the tree that you were lying underneath. Walking into the tree, looking up, note the vast branch system, how tall and high it is, looking down, note the vast root system, reaching down into the earth farther than you can see. Then, notice that one of the roots is larger than the others, and resembles a spiral staircase. Imagine then stepping onto the 13th step, the step of transformation, then spiraling down and around and inward to the 12th step, then down and around to the 11th and the 10th, spiraling down and around and inward to the 9th, then the 8th, then around and inward to the 7th and the 6th step. Then, pausing on the sixth step, note that as you look up you can no longer see the top, and looking down, that you can no longer see the bottom. You are standing in the middle of the spiral, in a moment of infinite perfection. If there is anything that you are carrying that you don’t want to take with you on your journey, you can leave it on this step. Continuing then to the 5th step and the 4th, spiraling around to the 3rd and the 2nd and then finally the 1st step, then stepping into a clearing with four doorways, each pointing in one of the four directions. Imagine yourself walking down the pathway that heads east.
It is dawn, and the sun is just peeking over the horizon – coloring the sky pink and gold. The landscape is gentle and green with the beginnings of new plants; there are early flowers just beginning to poke up over the grass. The pathway that you are walking on is lined with violets, and you make your way along it as it snakes its way upward around a tall hill. You make your way toward the top, feeling the new life teeming all around you in the valley below. When you reach the top, you see that others have gathered already – friends, guides, ancestors, and you join them in the circle. Your wise woman arrives last, stepping into the centre, with Barack Obama.
All is quiet for a while, feeling the powerful silence build until it takes on almost a sound of its own. All the while, the sunlight is increasing, until the circle is completely illumined in a golden dawn’s light. Those in the circle are illuminated, each brightly reflecting love. They have come with a message for Barack Obama, and in turn, each one speaks. When they finish, you are able to speak to them as well, ask questions, or just speak whatever truth is on your mind.
Then, your wise woman calls you into the center of the circle, where she has prepared the ground for seeds. She asks you to plant the seeds for those things that you would like to see growing in your life. Then each person in the circle plants seeds for you as well, which they will nurture and support on your behalf. You return to the circle and join hands with the others until the sun is high in the sky. You feel the hope of spring surrounding everyone and everything on the earth.
When you feel that your time in the circle is complete, your wise woman leads you out of the circle and to a beautiful stone table that has appeared, filled with all kinds of food and drink, and those in your circle join you at the table for a beautiful inaugural celebration. You can converse freely with everyone present.
When the meal is finished and it is time to go, you once again surround Barack Obama, focusing love, light, wisdom and power on him. Finally, you say goodbye to your wise woman, and head away from the circle, back along the path lined with violets. The sun has fully risen now, and the path is more brightly lit than before. When you reach the doorway to the east, you step through back toward the staircase.
Stepping back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the fourth step and the fifth. Then spiraling around to the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that moment of infinite perfection. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then back into to the tree. Stepping out of the tree, you find your place beneath it, again enjoying the sweet night air. Then feeling your consciousness return to the space you are in, and, when ready opening your eyes.
Prayers for our circle
Prayers for our world, for ourselves, for the future – that it be very bright!
Much love,
Tara
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Full Moon in Cancer, January 10, 2009
Hi everyone,
It is the first full moon of the new year and a beautiful love-filled moon it is. Hope you enjoyed your holidays and are getting back into the swing of real life!
Calling the circle
As we contemplate this full moon, we call to the spirits of the East, spirits of Springtime, new beginnings, new starts. Element of air, first breath, cool dawn. The power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.
We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within us always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.
And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.
Now we summon the spirits of our season, the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told, where laws are made. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.
And we call to those spirits above us, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children, and to the brightest of moons. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.
And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.
Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome.
Where is the Moon?
This full moon is in Cancer; a big loving moon. A mothering, nurturing moon. A psychic connection and soul-mate moon. It is the moon of all moons – and a great time to let yourself be filled with love. All kinds of love. As I like to tell Owen: love is everything. And it really is.
Talking stick
I love this moon. It puts me in the mind of thinking about love, the kind of deep love that you know can never fade or change or end. I have been lucky in my life to have experienced that kind of love in all different ways: as a partner, a wife, a child, a sister, a mother. I just passed my 13th wedding anniversary a few days ago with Gary; I can’t believe it has been that long. And I know how lucky we are to be here. I am extremely content with our relationship and feel the miracle of that deeply. So it seems funny to me that I feel inclined to write about that kind of love, but I’ve started this blog entry a few times and then deleted it. This is what wants to be written. I don’t know why.
I have loved five men in my life extremely deeply (none as much as you babe, if you’re reading this, Gary!) Three of them I was in long-term relationships with, including my current one. Two of them I loved but they didn’t or weren’t able to love me in the way that I wished. Although I have been married for 13 years, a fight with Gary can still make me cry myself to sleep or rage with a vengeance, yet, this morning, sitting on his lap and looking at him, I felt like I did when we first got together: young, and light and in love. It isn’t like either of those a lot of the time. It is real life and half the time we just carry on doing, doing, doing but sometimes, in those moments of intensity it is like the whole world comes to a stop, for better or for worse, and the relationship takes over. It’s much easier when it is going well, obviously, but even that can be a challenge. Perhaps the biggest one. In those moments I need to face myself and look at who I am, what I bring, what I feel and, sometimes reluctantly, continue to grow. I wonder about some of the relationships in my life that haven’t worked out. At least one of them was because I couldn’t bear to think what would have happened to me if I had really let myself go and given in to all that love. Would I have been extinguished? Or would my love have been matched and would we have set the world on fire? I don’t know, but at the time it was too big a risk to take.
Love is always a risk though. Now, when I think of my life without Gary, I can’t even begin to imagine it. He is my best friend, my partner, my advisor, my lover. He makes me laugh, he makes me crazy, but most of all he understands me to my core. To my soul. As I am getting older I do think about the possibility that one day this will end. And I only just now realized that I need to watch that, watch that I don’t shut off any part of myself. That I need to allow that vulnerability or the relationship cannot continue to grow. God/dess knows it has its challenges as it is, with all the things that compete for our time and attention. But if I want this love to continue to be the biggest of my life then I need to continue to give it all of my energy – and not ever give way to complacency, or fear, or even to the past. I need to forge forward, heart open, love blazing.
So, in the spirit of that, I am going to finish this blog and go hang out with my husband. And try and make time to do that more often as a commitment to this big love moon.
Meditation
Imagine yourself lying beneath an ancient willow tree, on a brisk winter evening. Stripped of its leaves, you are profoundly aware of the moon shining down on you – shining down until it is touching you, reaching right into your heart. With each breath, the moonlight feels as though it is reaching through you, deep into the earth, then upward into the sky again. As it moves through you and into the earth, you feel it spiraling deep below you, into something of a staircase. You stand up, and begin to wind your way down the staircase of moonlight, beginning on the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then spiraling around to the twelfth and the eleventh, then around to the tenth, then spiraling down and around and inward to the ninth, then the eighth, and around and inward to the seventh, then the sixth. You pause for a moment on the sixth step, leaving anything behind that you don’t choose to take along with you. Then continuing to spiral down and around to the fifth step, then the fourth, then the third. And around and inward to the second, and then finally the first step. You step off the staircase onto firm ground and head out toward the north.
You step out to a place that is very familiar to you, a place of refuge that you seek when times are stressful – a place that you return to when you need to feel a sense of your centre. You walk through that landscape, unique to you, where you know every tree, every blade of grass, every flower. A place of comfort and warmth. You make your way to the home that you know to be at the centre of this landscape – a home that is always there, always welcoming – the home of your wise woman.
When you arrive, as you are about to knock, the door swings open and your wise woman greets you, giving you a big kiss and hug. Her home feels particularly familiar today, the most at home you have ever felt here. She leads you to the kitchen where she has cooked for you and you speak freely with her about anything that comes to mind, or just listen to what she has to say to you.
When you are ready, she leads you from the kitchen to a hallway with many doors. You walk to the doorway that feels right for you, and then open the door. In the centre of the room is a cauldron and someone tending it. This person might be someone you know, maybe a guide, maybe an ancestor, maybe someone from your life. Whoever it is calls you over to the cauldron. When you are close enough you look inside to see what is holds. Whoever is tending to the cauldron tells you that it has two purposes for you: the first is for you to release something into the cauldron that needs to be healed and the second is for you to take something from it that you need to move forward.
As you look into the cauldron, you think about what you might want to release – and when you are ready, you place it into the cauldron. When you are ready, your guide beckons you to reach deep into the cauldron to take from it what you need. You can reach in and take as many objects as are right for you. If you have any questions, you can ask your guide, or your wise woman.
When you are ready, you thank the guardian of the cauldron and head back to the doorway, knowing that this is a place to which you can always return. Your wise woman leads you back to the front of the house, back to path that took you here. She gives you a big hug goodbye, and while in her embrace, you thank her and then head back out into that familiar place, drinking in the feeling of peace and home until you arrive back at the staircase of moonlight.
You step back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the fourth step and the fifth. Then spiraling around to the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that perfect moment in infinity. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then lying back down onto the earth where you began, under the beautiful willow, feeling the moonlight shining on you. And when you are ready you open your eyes.
Prayers for our circle
Continued prayers for everyone in this new year.
Much love to all of you--
Tara
It is the first full moon of the new year and a beautiful love-filled moon it is. Hope you enjoyed your holidays and are getting back into the swing of real life!
Calling the circle
As we contemplate this full moon, we call to the spirits of the East, spirits of Springtime, new beginnings, new starts. Element of air, first breath, cool dawn. The power of life, springing forth. We call the spirits of the East and ask them to join our circle.
We call now to the spirits of the South, spirits of strength, power, warmth, clarity, motivation, energy, movement. Element of fire, bright fires lit at midday. The power of light, illuminating us. The fire that is our passion, burning deeply within us always. We call the spirits of the South and ask them to join our circle.
And we call to the Spirits of the West. Spirits of our deepest feelings, our strongest emotions, our truest love. A sunset over a calm ocean, a still lake reflecting back the sky, the still waters that run deep, deep within. Element of water, emanating the power of love. We call to the spirits of the West and ask them to join our circle.
Now we summon the spirits of our season, the spirits of the North. Spirits of midnight, dark moonless skies in winter, places where truths are told, where laws are made. Element of earth, grounding us. Power of law, karma, ancestral wisdom, we call to the spirits of the North and we ask them to join our circle.
And we call to those spirits above us, angels, stars, heavens, light beings everywhere, those souls not yet incarnate. Children of our children, and to the brightest of moons. We call the spirits above and ask them to join us.
And we call to the spirits below us, to the earth that grounds us and keeps us steady, the green kingdom with its deep roots and to the lava beneath the crust that impassions us. We call the spirits below and ask them to join us.
Finally, we call to the spirits of the center, where all the directions meet and merge and where they meet and merge in each one of us. The central flame. The sacred spirit. This circle is closed, a safe and sacred circle where everyone is welcome.
Where is the Moon?
This full moon is in Cancer; a big loving moon. A mothering, nurturing moon. A psychic connection and soul-mate moon. It is the moon of all moons – and a great time to let yourself be filled with love. All kinds of love. As I like to tell Owen: love is everything. And it really is.
Talking stick
I love this moon. It puts me in the mind of thinking about love, the kind of deep love that you know can never fade or change or end. I have been lucky in my life to have experienced that kind of love in all different ways: as a partner, a wife, a child, a sister, a mother. I just passed my 13th wedding anniversary a few days ago with Gary; I can’t believe it has been that long. And I know how lucky we are to be here. I am extremely content with our relationship and feel the miracle of that deeply. So it seems funny to me that I feel inclined to write about that kind of love, but I’ve started this blog entry a few times and then deleted it. This is what wants to be written. I don’t know why.
I have loved five men in my life extremely deeply (none as much as you babe, if you’re reading this, Gary!) Three of them I was in long-term relationships with, including my current one. Two of them I loved but they didn’t or weren’t able to love me in the way that I wished. Although I have been married for 13 years, a fight with Gary can still make me cry myself to sleep or rage with a vengeance, yet, this morning, sitting on his lap and looking at him, I felt like I did when we first got together: young, and light and in love. It isn’t like either of those a lot of the time. It is real life and half the time we just carry on doing, doing, doing but sometimes, in those moments of intensity it is like the whole world comes to a stop, for better or for worse, and the relationship takes over. It’s much easier when it is going well, obviously, but even that can be a challenge. Perhaps the biggest one. In those moments I need to face myself and look at who I am, what I bring, what I feel and, sometimes reluctantly, continue to grow. I wonder about some of the relationships in my life that haven’t worked out. At least one of them was because I couldn’t bear to think what would have happened to me if I had really let myself go and given in to all that love. Would I have been extinguished? Or would my love have been matched and would we have set the world on fire? I don’t know, but at the time it was too big a risk to take.
Love is always a risk though. Now, when I think of my life without Gary, I can’t even begin to imagine it. He is my best friend, my partner, my advisor, my lover. He makes me laugh, he makes me crazy, but most of all he understands me to my core. To my soul. As I am getting older I do think about the possibility that one day this will end. And I only just now realized that I need to watch that, watch that I don’t shut off any part of myself. That I need to allow that vulnerability or the relationship cannot continue to grow. God/dess knows it has its challenges as it is, with all the things that compete for our time and attention. But if I want this love to continue to be the biggest of my life then I need to continue to give it all of my energy – and not ever give way to complacency, or fear, or even to the past. I need to forge forward, heart open, love blazing.
So, in the spirit of that, I am going to finish this blog and go hang out with my husband. And try and make time to do that more often as a commitment to this big love moon.
Meditation
Imagine yourself lying beneath an ancient willow tree, on a brisk winter evening. Stripped of its leaves, you are profoundly aware of the moon shining down on you – shining down until it is touching you, reaching right into your heart. With each breath, the moonlight feels as though it is reaching through you, deep into the earth, then upward into the sky again. As it moves through you and into the earth, you feel it spiraling deep below you, into something of a staircase. You stand up, and begin to wind your way down the staircase of moonlight, beginning on the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then spiraling around to the twelfth and the eleventh, then around to the tenth, then spiraling down and around and inward to the ninth, then the eighth, and around and inward to the seventh, then the sixth. You pause for a moment on the sixth step, leaving anything behind that you don’t choose to take along with you. Then continuing to spiral down and around to the fifth step, then the fourth, then the third. And around and inward to the second, and then finally the first step. You step off the staircase onto firm ground and head out toward the north.
You step out to a place that is very familiar to you, a place of refuge that you seek when times are stressful – a place that you return to when you need to feel a sense of your centre. You walk through that landscape, unique to you, where you know every tree, every blade of grass, every flower. A place of comfort and warmth. You make your way to the home that you know to be at the centre of this landscape – a home that is always there, always welcoming – the home of your wise woman.
When you arrive, as you are about to knock, the door swings open and your wise woman greets you, giving you a big kiss and hug. Her home feels particularly familiar today, the most at home you have ever felt here. She leads you to the kitchen where she has cooked for you and you speak freely with her about anything that comes to mind, or just listen to what she has to say to you.
When you are ready, she leads you from the kitchen to a hallway with many doors. You walk to the doorway that feels right for you, and then open the door. In the centre of the room is a cauldron and someone tending it. This person might be someone you know, maybe a guide, maybe an ancestor, maybe someone from your life. Whoever it is calls you over to the cauldron. When you are close enough you look inside to see what is holds. Whoever is tending to the cauldron tells you that it has two purposes for you: the first is for you to release something into the cauldron that needs to be healed and the second is for you to take something from it that you need to move forward.
As you look into the cauldron, you think about what you might want to release – and when you are ready, you place it into the cauldron. When you are ready, your guide beckons you to reach deep into the cauldron to take from it what you need. You can reach in and take as many objects as are right for you. If you have any questions, you can ask your guide, or your wise woman.
When you are ready, you thank the guardian of the cauldron and head back to the doorway, knowing that this is a place to which you can always return. Your wise woman leads you back to the front of the house, back to path that took you here. She gives you a big hug goodbye, and while in her embrace, you thank her and then head back out into that familiar place, drinking in the feeling of peace and home until you arrive back at the staircase of moonlight.
You step back up onto the first step, spiraling upward and outward to the second step and the third, and upward and outward to the fourth step and the fifth. Then spiraling around to the sixth step, and pausing now on the sixth step, retrieving anything that you left behind before, or just leaving it behind in that perfect moment in infinity. Climbing now to the seventh and upward to the eighth, upward and outward to the ninth, then the tenth, and around to the eleventh and the twelfth and then finally to the thirteenth step, the step of transformation, then lying back down onto the earth where you began, under the beautiful willow, feeling the moonlight shining on you. And when you are ready you open your eyes.
Prayers for our circle
Continued prayers for everyone in this new year.
Much love to all of you--
Tara
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